Unlucky in Death
It’s like there is a law of diminishing return when it comes to death and grieving —people can understand one tragedy, but two? That’s too many.
Corpse Pose
Grief can feel like an invisibility cloak. It allows you to hear and see things differently, and be privy to thoughts and feelings normally inaccessible.
The Shape of Grief
Grief may warp your memories, but you can choose how you let it shape you after your person has died.
The Girl with the Grief Ribbon
My grief feels like those terrible “waist trainer” girdles celebrity women wear. It wraps around you, hugging and tightening and squeezing your breath away, and you have no choice. It is also a terrible replacement for your person.
Finding the Edge
Watching surfing, I’ve found many metaphors for life with stage 4 cancer and loss
Death, Grief, Healthy Living(?), Repeat
During early grief, constants are so important, finding anything you enjoy, to focus your mind and get you out of bed feels miraculous.
Grieve, Procrastinate, Repeat
The great thing about procrastination is, like grief, it’s invisible and really, the only person whose life it’s harming is your own.
A little darkness
And now, because an extremely terrible most unlucky thing happened to me that elephant will always be in the room. I’m okay with the elephant, I’d gladly talk about the elephant all day and all night (its name is Daryl). But I know it’s hard for other people, and I think it’s because there is an even bigger elephant in the room which is that we are all going to die one day, and how do you talk about that without feeling like a real mood killer?
Motherless Daughter
She has felt so close to me the last couple of weeks, as the moon moved to fullness and the photos of galaxies from we have never seen before were revealed by the James Webb Space Telescope. Some of the photos looked like distant party lights to me, beckoning us to dream, to go further, to wonder at what might be out there.
Grief as Writer’s Block
I stumbled on a quote recently about how projects you were working on when your loved one was alive may no longer seem relevant or worthwhile to you, and those projects take on a whole lot of baggage after they are gone. I wish the project in my case was a bathroom remodel instead of a novel.
Grief and the Four Burners Theory
I think of all the hours I wasted worrying about that stuff and how I could have let it go and just enjoyed my time with Daryl and let go of the anxiety.